2023: I am W H O L E

As 2022 comes to a close and 2023 arrives, I am drawn to the practice of reflecting on the year behind me and setting intentions for the year ahead. Over the past year, I have prioritized my own well-being in a whole new way. I could never have predicted that turning my part-time private practice into my full-time job would not only bring me satisfaction in my career, it would allow me to create more intentional, sacred space in my whole life.

Prior to committing to this practice full-time, I maintained a part-time practice while also working full time in a variety of other jobs, from school counseling positions to community mental health agencies. While I learned a tremendous amount from these other jobs, allowing myself to commit fully to my private practice has given me the space to shape my life in such a way that I can prioritize my physical, emotional, spiritual, and intellectual well-being in new ways. Committing to this work as my full-time career has given me the precious space to truly practice what I preach, to dive deeper into my own healing, to lean into my authenticity and wholeness.

Of course, starting a small business has its ups and downs, and there have been (and will be) plenty of challenges. This year has not been without its difficult moments; but none of the difficulties compare to being able to join so many of you on your own healing journeys. Welcoming the wisdom of our bodies into the therapy room has been incredibly powerful, and I look forward to the future of embodied living, working, and loving.

This year, I was drawn to the practice of identifying a word of the year for the upcoming year. I first learned of this practice through Gretchen Rubin’s podcast, Happier. Ironically, given the name of the podcast that inspired this practice, one of my deep learnings in 2022 was the sacredness and power of all emotions - the sadness, the anger, the fear, the jealousy, the hatred, the anxiety, the disgust, and yes, the happiness, too. I am not striving to cling to happiness as if it is the only emotion worth feeling; I am striving to flow within my own wholeness, which includes the ebb and flow of all emotions.

“Wholeness” has showed up in a variety of ways for me in 2022, especially in the books I’ve read. In fact, I’ve learned that prioritizing daily time for reading is self-care for me, so I have worked hard to give myself this daily gift.

In her book, Fierce Self-Compassion, Kristin Neff writes about the idea of yin and yang energy, which, in terms of self-compassion, can be described as the tender (yin) and fierceness (yang) of compassion. Both tenderness and fierceness have their place in our lives, and without a balance of both, we are not whole.

I also learned about wholeness through Sheleana Aiyana’s book Becoming the One, in which she describes the process of coming home to yourself, to the wholeness that already exists within. We are not made whole by other people, by romantic partners, by friends, or by the things we have or do. We are already innately whole.

Dick Schwartz’s No Bad Parts allowed me to peer inside myself in a whole new way by, again, revealing to me another way of being with my own inherent wholeness. I am made up of parts, but none of them are bad. I am already whole and good and enough.

Other books that I’ve read that have given me further insight into my own inherent wholeness are: The Language of Emotions, by Karla McLaren; Lighter, by Yung Pueblo; Bittersweet, by Susan Cain; Sacred Medicine, by Lissa Rankin; and The Wisdom of Your Body, by Hillary L. McBride.

Although the concept of wholeness has been prevalent in 2022, I am choosing this word for 2023 (or perhaps it has chosen me), because I feel that I have so much more work to do to settle into my wholeness, to allow it to not just be an intellectual idea but a truth that deeply resonates through my body.

I am so grateful for the ways I have experienced my own and others’ wholeness this year, and I look forward to how the year ahead will guide me further along this path.

Do you have a practice to welcome in the new year? Are you interested in identifying a word of the year? If so, let me know in the comments below!