Solo Travel: A Coming Home to Myself
Traveling solo is not better or worse than traveling with a partner or a friend. This year I have learned to relish solo travel. People often say, “I could never do that. I could never travel alone.” Well, until I entered my 30’s, I also thought that was true for me. Turns out, a lot was holding me back that I needed to work with in order to create the confidence to explore the world on my own.
Solo travel is not always more fun than traveling with another person - but I’ve learned that, for me, fun isn’t always the point. That’s not to say I don’t have fun traveling solo - I can do whatever I want, whenever I want - including seeing a kids’ movie in the middle of the day in the theater, popcorn all to myself; hopping from coffee shop to coffee shop, reading a chapter of my book in each one; crawling into bed early and ordering food delivery to my hotel; exploring museums at my own leisurely pace, needing only to mind my own internal dialogue.
While some of the things I choose to do while traveling alone are fun for me, some of the things are challenging or rewarding in a different way, a way that hits a deeper spot in my soul, that puts me in touch with feelings I wouldn’t feel as deeply or at all if I had company - things like meeting a stranger for coffee, navigating a new city in the rain at night, journaling while sitting at a bar rather than scrolling on my phone, reading a book which is inviting me to ponder some of the biggest questions life has to offer.
I learn a lot about myself when I travel alone - what do I want to do with my time and money and energy? My experience of growing up within a high-control religious environment taught me to ignore my own wants and desires, to the point where I had learned to completely not feel them. Traveling by myself opens me up to the opportunity to consider what I actually want in any given moment, and honor those desires with freedom.
On my most recent trip alone, I learned things about myself that I knew on an intellectual level but hadn’t yet explored on a deeper, more raw emotional level: that I really value connections with other humans. This may seem obvious, since I form deep connections with people for a living. However, I really learned how much this type of connection fills me with life, or prana, “life-force” as us yogis might say. Chatting with the bartender, visiting with other guests at the hotel, petting a cute dog on the sidewalk, listening to live music and dancing next to strangers - these connections all feed my soul. While I’ve always thought of myself as introverted, the opportunity to travel completely by myself allowed me to recognize how much I value a balance of connection and solitude.
Traveling alone, especially as a woman, can be really lonely. It can be really hard at times. It can be really scary. But I think some of the growth I see in myself comes from what I do with the loneliness, the fear, the anxiety. With no other voices around me, what is it like to tune into my own inner voice? My intuition? My deep thoughts?
Traveling solo also makes coming home to my loved ones that much sweeter. It enhances my gratitude for the easy safety and comfort I feel as soon as I pull into my driveway. It makes me grateful that I have people to come home to, that traveling alone is a choice, not a necessity. It makes a shared meal and a shared bed take on a whole new aura of love.
As hard as solo travel is while I’m in it, I come home craving more - not to be alone, but to intentionally come home to myself.
Have you traveled by yourself? Do you have a different way of taking time out of your busy and routine life to reconnect with your soul? Let me know in the comments below!
